He graciously dispersed my fears, and filled my heart with
peace. To me the scene of dissolution was exceedingly solemn. May my
last end be like hers!--I followed the remains of dear Elizabeth to
the grave, to which we consigned them 'in sure and certain hope of a
joyful resurrection.' Surely this hope has preserved me from yielding
to useless tears, as on former occasions;--for I loved her. Henceforth
may it be my constant study to be found ready, that, like her, I
may triumph in the prospect of dissolution.--Visited two or three
afflicted persons in the village, perhaps for the last time: may I
find them all again in the day of eternity. Took tea with Mrs. B. and
her daughter, whom I would gladly have persuaded to accept the offers
of mercy; but the grace of God alone can affect the heart.--After an
absence of six weeks I returned home: the day was fine. Truly mercy
follows me. Through courtesy to a friend, I wounded my own soul by
yielding to converse on subjects, which no way tended to promote
fervency of spirit. I felt humbled in consequence, and as if I could
not lift my heart to God; but before the close of the service, which
I afterwards attended, the Lord graciously softened my hardness
down--melting me into tears.--I close the year fully bent upon giving
myself to God. While I write, I enjoy peace. O Thou that seest me,
Thyself unseen, direct my pen, and guide me to Thyself. Here on my
knees I surrender myself to Thee; if Thou discoverest any guile in
me, reveal it to me, and make me wholly thine.
Pages:
132
133
134
135
136
137
138
139
140
141
142
143
144
145
146
147
148
149
150
151
152
153
154
155
156