This is surely some
of the filthiness of the spirit from which I must be cleansed: I feel
ashamed of it; Lord, deliver me.--Have been to see Fanny McD. She is
very ill in body, but when asked respecting her soul, she said, 'I
have had a feast to-day while alone with Jesus, my Redeemer.' She is
one of the Lord's jewels, like Lazarus, enclosed in a casket of
rags. After hearing Mr. Vevers preach from 'we must all appear at
the judgment-seat of Christ,' I dreamt I saw the heavens melting with
fervent heat. I felt no condemnation, but began to pray earnestly.
The impression, which this has made on my mind, has awakened increased
earnestness--A stranger came into the class, who was much affected;
gladly would I have travelled in birth for her, until Christ was
formed in her heart; but our time was limited, and she went mourning
away. From thence I went to Albion Street School, to converse with
some of the children; several of them wept. In the evening I attended
St. John's Church. I can enjoy a Gospel ministry in the church, as
well as the chapel: true religion destroys every wall of partition.--I
received a very affecting letter from cousin Penelope. Elizabeth is
in a very afflicted, but happy state. During the night I have been
wakeful, and much drawn out in prayer; but felt reproved for having
purchased something which I could have done without. I acknowledge my
weakness. May the Lord give me a deeper sense of my responsibility,
as the steward of His manifold gifts.
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