CHAPTER VIII
19. Then, as this vehement quarrel, which I waged with my
soul in the chamber of my heart, was raging inside my inner
dwelling, agitated both in mind and countenance, I seized upon
Alypius and exclaimed: "What is the matter with us? What is this?
What did you hear? The uninstructed start up and take heaven, and
we -- with all our learning but so little heart -- see where we
wallow in flesh and blood! Because others have gone before us,
are we ashamed to follow, and not rather ashamed at our not
following?" I scarcely knew what I said, and in my excitement I
flung away from him, while he gazed at me in silent astonishment.
For I did not sound like myself: my face, eyes, color, tone
expressed my meaning more clearly than my words.
There was a little garden belonging to our lodging, of which
we had the use -- as of the whole house -- for the master, our
landlord, did not live there. The tempest in my breast hurried me
out into this garden, where no one might interrupt the fiery
struggle in which I was engaged with myself, until it came to the
outcome that thou knewest though I did not.
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